What’s 5 pounds? I was agonizing over it. Right now I weigh 130 pounds. 130! I haven’t weighed 130 pounds since I was maybe 9 or 10 years old. I found myself stuck in the mindset that I needed to lose that last 5 though, I needed to weigh 125. Why? Some chart I found online says that I have a small frame and the ideal weight for my frame and height is apparently 114 – 127 lbs. I’m 3 lbs more than my “ideal” weight.
Last week was a time of realization for me though. Do I really care about 5 vanity pounds? Do I care about being what some chart on the internet says is “ideal” for me or do I care about my personal health? The reason that I went into this journey in the first place was health. I don’t want to become a diabetic, I want to be around for many years in the future. I want to see my kids become whoever they are going to become. I feel like I need to return to my original vision.
I was eating too few calories, I had zero energy to do anything but what I absolutely had to do. I decided to start reverse dieting. If you google the term “reverse dieting” you’ll find it used commonly in the body building community. I’m no body builder, but I do need to find a place of health for myself, mentally and physically.
My husband bought me a Fitbit, which I love. It is “somebody” to be accountable to. Because of my Fitbit, I’ve greatly increased my activity level. Because of my Fitbit, I realized just how little I’ve been eating during the week. Turning it around has not been an instant 180. I’ve not turned on a dime. I’ve turned more like a large boat, slowly but with purpose.
The new pattern that I’m going into is called carb cycling. I recently decided to test my sugar with some old strips that I had from my last bout with gestational diabetes. If the test was accurate, my blood sugar issues have gone away. This is a scary thing for me because all year I’ve been terrified of carbohydrate. I’m going to start adding them back on weight training days, I’m going to start working out on a schedule rather than just trying to satisfy that minimum 30 minutes of activity a day. I already feel myself getting stronger, things can only go up from here.
I’m going to try it for a couple of weeks, if I find success there will be a follow-up post with my exercise regime and meal plan. Wish me luck!